The Medical and Psych Screening
The reality of this journey really started settling in when the medical and psych screenings began. First up for me was the psych screening. Prior to speaking with the psychiatrist, I was sent an online assessment to complete. This assessment is A LOT of questions, 300+ questions. You will want to give yourself a lot of uninterrupted time to dedicate to this task. I believe I completed mine in 1.5 hours. Following the assessment, we scheduled our call with the psychiatrist. This call was thorough, so plan to talk a lot. We went over mine and my husband’s
The Legal Process
The contract. Break out the highlighters; there is a lot to go over! First, I selected an attorney from a list of recommendations sent to me by NYSC and signed a retainer contract with her. We then waited while the IPs attorney drafted the contract. I was frantically refreshing my inbox waiting for the first draft to arrive; it became more exciting to check my emails than to check my socials. We received the first draft of the contract two weeks after beginning the legal process. I read through the 38-page contract two times before scheduling a call with
The Arrival of Baby M: A Journey of Strength and Joy
On Monday, April 22, 2024, at 38 weeks and 5 days, I started experiencing contractions. Initially 90 minutes apart, they were distinct enough to recognize. Along with contractions, I had bouts of diarrhea and vomiting, prompting me to call my OB for advice. They recommended monitoring my symptoms and advised heading to the hospital if they progressed. By evening, the contractions had intensified, so I headed to the hospital where Amber and the intended mom met me. After being triaged, monitored, and tested, it was determined that I was only 2 cm dilated, and I was advised to return home.
Third Trimester Realities: Preparing for Wombmate’s Arrival
This journey feels increasingly real with growth ultrasounds scheduled every four weeks and diligently following medical recommendations. I’m officially three sizes bigger than my pre-pregnancy weight, which has made shopping at my usual stores a challenge. Thankfully, working remotely means I can comfortably live in oversized t-shirts and lounge wear. LOL We are busy planning for the parents' arrival around the delivery date, discussing essential questions to prepare for Wombmate's "eviction." While I prefer a spontaneous delivery unless medically necessary, the intended parents are fully supportive of my wishes, making this final stage a cooperative and respectful process. At my
Second Trimester Milestones: Embracing the Journey
As we celebrate the good standing of all prenatal tests, we find ourselves both joyful and anxious in anticipation of the 18-week anatomy scan. "Wombmate" is definitely making her preferences known, especially when it comes to certain smells and foods. Despite these aversions, daily 30-minute morning walks remain a cherished routine, thanks to the flexibility and encouragement from my new job. Working remotely has also granted me the luxury of cooking more often, providing healthier options for my growing appetite. Our anatomy scan brought mixed emotions: the joy of seeing our baby girl and the discovery of suspected clubfoot. This
Pre-Screening to Matching Process
I thought about being a surrogate for a long time. After I had my daughter, I knew this was something I really wanted to do for another family. Before it was legal in NY, I started my surrogacy journey in 2023 with a different agency. It took about 7 months and right before the matching process, I found out I was not eligible to work with the agency because they were out of state. It felt like a complete waste of time, but it was helpful in the long run. I took a few months before looking into surrogacy
Navigating New Beginnings: A Journey Through the 1st Trimester
As we celebrate the successful implantation of our newly named "Wombmate," each day brings a mix of anticipation and anxiety, especially as we await that first precious ultrasound heartbeat. Medication schedules with precision has become a newfound responsibility, while grounding exercises and meditation have become essential tools in managing stress and nurturing a sense of calmness—a skill I'm learning along this journey toward perfection for our growing family. At around 5 weeks, the gentle onset of nausea signaled the beginning of new transformation. This soon intensified with an abrupt aversion to the taste and smell of bananas by week 6.
The Matching Process
Setting up my surrogate profile was rather simple. My only wish was that I did not want to transfer multiple embryos at one time. For the rest, I really wanted the experience to be whatever the Intended Parents were hoping for, so I walked into the matching process open minded. I can’t explain the gasp I gasped with how QUICKLY the NYSC team presented me with a match. It was less than a week after we finalized my profile that I received an email from Joe with the Intended Parents’ profile. I was equally ecstatic and heartbroken to read about
